diff --git a/IPython/parallel/apps/ipclusterapp.py b/IPython/parallel/apps/ipclusterapp.py
index cca9eed..22bc5ec 100755
--- a/IPython/parallel/apps/ipclusterapp.py
+++ b/IPython/parallel/apps/ipclusterapp.py
@@ -282,9 +282,11 @@ class IPClusterEngines(BaseParallelApplication):
         if new:
             self.log_to_file = True
 
+    early_shutdown = Int(30, config=True, help="The timeout (in seconds)")
+    _stopping = False
+    
     aliases = Dict(engine_aliases)
     flags = Dict(engine_flags)
-    _stopping = False
 
     def initialize(self, argv=None):
         super(IPClusterEngines, self).initialize(argv)
@@ -293,7 +295,6 @@ class IPClusterEngines(BaseParallelApplication):
 
     def init_launchers(self):
         self.engine_launcher = self.build_launcher(self.engine_launcher_class, 'EngineSet')
-        self.engine_launcher.on_stop(lambda r: self.loop.stop())
 
     def init_signal(self):
         # Setup signals
@@ -320,13 +321,42 @@ class IPClusterEngines(BaseParallelApplication):
         )
         return launcher
 
+    def engines_started_okay(self):
+        self.log.info("Engines appear to have started successfully")
+        self.early_shutdown = 0
+    
     def start_engines(self):
         self.log.info("Starting %i engines"%self.n)
         self.engine_launcher.start(self.n)
+        self.engine_launcher.on_stop(self.engines_stopped_early)
+        if self.early_shutdown:
+            ioloop.DelayedCallback(self.engines_started_okay, self.early_shutdown*1000, self.loop).start()
+
+    def engines_stopped_early(self, r):
+        if self.early_shutdown and not self._stopping:
+            self.log.error("""
+            Engines shutdown early, they probably failed to connect.
+            
+            Check the engine log files for output.
+            
+            If your controller and engines are not on the same machine, you probably
+            have to instruct the controller to listen on an interface other than localhost.
+            
+            You can set this by adding "--ip='*'" to your ControllerLauncher.controller_args.
+            
+            Be sure to read our security docs before instructing your controller to listen on
+            a public interface.
+            """)
+            self.stop_launchers()
+        
+        return self.engines_stopped(r)
+    
+    def engines_stopped(self, r):
+        return self.loop.stop()
 
     def stop_engines(self):
-        self.log.info("Stopping Engines...")
         if self.engine_launcher.running:
+            self.log.info("Stopping Engines...")
             d = self.engine_launcher.stop()
             return d
         else:
@@ -338,7 +368,7 @@ class IPClusterEngines(BaseParallelApplication):
             self.log.error("IPython cluster: stopping")
             self.stop_engines()
             # Wait a few seconds to let things shut down.
-            dc = ioloop.DelayedCallback(self.loop.stop, 4000, self.loop)
+            dc = ioloop.DelayedCallback(self.loop.stop, 3000, self.loop)
             dc.start()
 
     def sigint_handler(self, signum, frame):
@@ -457,7 +487,11 @@ class IPClusterStart(IPClusterEngines):
         self.controller_launcher = self.build_launcher(self.controller_launcher_class, 'Controller')
         self.engine_launcher = self.build_launcher(self.engine_launcher_class, 'EngineSet')
         self.controller_launcher.on_stop(self.stop_launchers)
-
+    
+    def engines_stopped(self, r):
+        """prevent parent.engines_stopped from stopping everything on engine shutdown"""
+        pass
+    
     def start_controller(self):
         self.controller_launcher.start()
 
diff --git a/IPython/parallel/engine/engine.py b/IPython/parallel/engine/engine.py
index 0a14f23..afd55b7 100644
--- a/IPython/parallel/engine/engine.py
+++ b/IPython/parallel/engine/engine.py
@@ -214,6 +214,14 @@ class EngineFactory(RegistrationFactory):
 
     def abort(self):
         self.log.fatal("Registration timed out after %.1f seconds"%self.timeout)
+        if '127' in self.url:
+            self.log.fatal("""
+            If the controller and engines are not on the same machine,
+            you will have to instruct the controller to listen on an external IP (in ipcontroller_config.py):
+                c.HubFactory.ip='*' # for all interfaces, internal and external
+                c.HubFactory.ip='192.168.1.101' # or any interface that the engines can see
+            or tunnel connections via ssh.
+            """)
         self.session.send(self.registrar, "unregistration_request", content=dict(id=self.id))
         time.sleep(1)
         sys.exit(255)